choice-making Archives - Page 3 of 4

Why Bali, Why Rosie, Why a Retreat?

8 weeks from now I’ll be facilitating the Weaving Heaven and Earth Retreat in Bali. I’ve been asked – Why Bali? What value is there in going so far away? And why me – Rosie? Why a retreat and not just a vacation? Why Bali? Put simply, Bali is Beautiful. Exquisitely, National Geographic beautiful! And the Balinese’s devotion to the sacred in all of life + rich history of ceremonies and rituals, envelops us visitors and carries us in the sacred vibration, a looong way from the stresses and rigors of life in the Western-culture cities we will be arriving

Cease Abandonment

Quite often for me, the writing of one article stirs some inner work that reveals another bump in the road – an obstacle that, again, on one level seems like no big deal, yet on another stops the natural unfolding of one’s life path. For every one of us, by sitting with these obstacles, an epiphany arises naturally, along with the doubt of its truth and realness. The Epiphany Last Sunday, after my article, “Aging Into Shameless Perfection” was published in Orcas Issues, I thought about all of those times in my life where I’d felt shamed, forsaken, and

Aging – a Never Ending Adventure in Deconstructing the Illusion of Reality

I’ve been living inside the illusion that what I am more than anything else is a mother. My identity is so inextricably tied to this role that it is as if I am wearing a latex suit of Donna Reed – the mother of all mothers on TV in the 60’s. I don’t know who I am without my identity as a mom. Due to circumstance and choices I made in my 20’s, I became an absentee parent. My children were very young at the time and came to have a long life with me participating infrequently. Though they called

Doing Absolutely Nothing – When Less is More

At the end of each coaching session, I ask my clients: "What’s the big take away from our time together?" My client Dan responded with: "Well, my big take away for this evening is that I’m paying you to help me do nothing." We both laughed until we had tears in our eyes. The truth will do that to you sometimes. *** Sharlene is taking watercolor lessons. She shares that she has tried watercolors before and didn’t find it satisfying. She didn’t get the results she wanted then, and so decided to try again. I asked her why she was

I Wonder What You See?

This morning I received a beautiful email from friend my Jeff Otis, whose home is also on Turtleback, a little bit higher than mine, with a view that is more open and expansive. In this email, Jeff writes: "Sometimes when I look out my office window, like right now, I wonder, ‘Can Rosie see the moon?’ Or, the other day when the golden afternoon light was painting Mt. Woolard, ‘Can Rosie see the beautiful light?’ I sometimes wonder what Rosie can see.” I was deeply moved by his wonderings, and by his sharing these wonderings with me. Rarely do we

The Anguish and Agony of Unrelenting Resistance

I have a client, Max, who in this moment finds himself in a life that is unmanageable. Regardless of where he is – at work, at home, in his truck driving between home and work – he is facing what feels like cataclysmic consequences. It is like he is attempting to walk through a field of land mines: whatever step he takes, regardless of the direction, it will inevitably result in a Ka-Boom! . . . . It is the end of pre-season for football. The athletes who have put their careers on the line to be chosen as one

Aging – What’s the Point?

When I think about the millions of people who are in their 60’s, 70’s, 80’s, and 90’s, I wonder what brings fulfillment to their lives. As they disengage from the external world, by choice or by circumstance, most will question reality, much like Scarlett, Martin and Thomas do. “When I was young,” started Scarlett, who is a beautiful, vivacious 80 year old, “everything mattered: What I looked like, what I wore, who I dated, where I lived, how many children I had, where they went to school. Everything mattered! I enjoyed waking up with a sense of purpose. Now I

Victims of Life’s Circumstances – Or Not!

Francis, a beautiful, creative woman and long time Island resident, came to my work place the other day. “I’ve been reading your articles on aging and dying in Orcas Issues, and you know,” she said with a wee bit of disdain in her voice, “aging isn’t all fun and light – sometimes there’s anger and hate. I’ve been dealing with hearing loss for a long time. My memory is deteriorating and I’m afraid that I’m losing my mind. I’m living with a lot of pain. I’m alone more often than not, and I’m angry about all of this. Sometimes I

Will I Like This When I’m Done?

I’m just coming back to the Island after participating in a Kuhn Sisters’ Week in Michigan. I had a lot of trepidation in setting out to attend this event – will I like this when I’m done? I head out anyway, thinking about it as an adventure, with no expectations. Just go! My four sisters and I love to create art and crafts. So, one part of our time together was Craft Day, when we would all sit around the table making something fun and beautiful. On a hot and humid Michigan day, it creates a time for more personal

Game Changers – They Happen When Least Expected

Sam is a 73 year old retired fellow, living in a two bedroom apartment in Houston. He is a veteran from the Viet Nam era, had a decent enough life with a couple of kids, an ex-wife, and a girlfriend of 25 years. Sam has been happy in his routines – stopping in at his local bank where he has coffee with some cronies. He visits with neighbors and participates in his community, as he has done for many decades. A longtime client of mine, James, in his mid 40’s, lives in Denver. He has four children, a wife he

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