Tag: love

Will I Like This When I’m Done?

I’m just coming back to the Island after participating in a Kuhn Sisters’ Week in Michigan. I had a lot of trepidation in setting out to attend this event – will I like this when I’m done? I head out anyway, thinking about it as an adventure, with no expectations. Just go! My four sisters and I love to create art and crafts. So, one part of our time together was Craft Day, when we would all sit around the table making something fun and beautiful. On a hot and humid Michigan day, it creates a time for more personal

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Game Changers – They Happen When Least Expected

Sam is a 73 year old retired fellow, living in a two bedroom apartment in Houston. He is a veteran from the Viet Nam era, had a decent enough life with a couple of kids, an ex-wife, and a girlfriend of 25 years. Sam has been happy in his routines – stopping in at his local bank where he has coffee with some cronies. He visits with neighbors and participates in his community, as he has done for many decades. A longtime client of mine, James, in his mid 40’s, lives in Denver. He has four children, a wife he

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Discerning the Essence of One’s Life

Fearless Freedom Barbara Herschel was a long time Orcas Islander. She was a big hearted activist and advocated for changes that made our community more viable in so many ways. She was a real gift.Barbara hired me as her Life Coach at the age of 78. Her husband Bill passed away, and after a long time of caregiving for him, she was ready to return to those activities that made her heart soar. She wanted to paint again – something she was passionate about, yet she just couldn’t get around to it. My job was to get her on track

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Boy, Do We LOVE to HATE!

While reading A Course in Miracles, I came across the concept “the special Hate relationship.” Wow! Do you know that approximately 70-80% of any given population hate their jobs? As I googled what we hate or dislike there are a lot of very unhappy people who hate or dislike well, everything. And, I love this statistic: 70% of our thoughts are negative thoughts. That is a lot of negativity – a proportion I suspect is hateful in nature. I know I’ve done a lot of hating over my life. I was actually in DENIAL (Didn’t Even Know I Am Lying)

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Do I Love My Life

Do I Love My Life? For years now, I’ve been aware that I wake up in the morning feeling slightly melancholy, with a small degree of anxiousness thrown in for good measure. I’m not depressed, though some might label it so. I just feel uninspired and unmotivated to jump out of bed. I guess the thought that runs parallel to these feelings is: What’s the point of my life for me? Sometimes, it just feels pointless. I delight when there are stimulations of some sort awaiting me, in which case I anticipate the day with enthusiasm. But when it feels

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What I’ve Learned, Thus far, on My Spiritual Journey

Transformation is not a one stop shop. There’s so many ways to transform and so many things to learn along the path. Here’s what I’ve learned to be true, at least for myself over the past few years: 1. There is only one source of currency / income. It may appear to come from your job, a personal or bank loan, inheritance or from your credit cards; but without the Universal Source of all that is, the currency would not be flowing from those sources. If the currency you are needing is not forthcoming in the form you think is

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5 Easy Steps to Shift from Self-Ignoring to Self-Love

I tell you, truthfully, that if all of us self-help enthusiasts would put into practice all the beautiful, inspirational advice we see on Twitter, in books and blogs, we’d put therapists, psychologist, and a lot of medical doctors out of business. I believe it’s possible that we are beginning to outsmart most mental health professionals. And as we do that, our physical well-being increase and dis-ease decreases. The dilemma is that as much as we want to have sweeter and easier lives, we are afraid of change. And, as much as we know, we aren’t using our intelligence much at

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When is an Act of Love Not an Act of Love

  When is an act of love not an act of love? Its when that act is attached to personal gain. I love my friend Harry. In this moment, I want to stop him from doing something very foolish and could be life-threatening. Yet, what I’m experiencing isn’t founded on love. It’s found on a need to gain control and to experience self-righteousness regarding my assumption that Harry doesn’t know better than to choose what he’s about to choose, and that I know better than him. I question my motives in this moment and find myself wanting. The question is:

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Why Say I Love You

  I can’t tell you the number of times I’ve manipulated people I love in the name of love. I did so because I believed I had something to gain, and something to lose. It’s a model of love based on ownership, property, and the getting and taking model of reality. Its fear-based. And, strategizing instilled a sense of invulnerability in me, if I can make a belief that I love and am loved by someone, even though it doesn’t really feel that way, well, its better than experiencing the reality of being unloved. Who am I, or what am

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Q is for Question Reality

I read on the back of a car many years ago a bumper sticker that read "Question Reality!" Up until that time my life had been a mish mash of confusing circumstances, and it was a revelatory experience to take these two words deeply into my soul. I breathed deeply and felt as though I’d been given a sign that there was light at the end of the tunnel. At this same time, the context of my life did not include any mechanisms, supports or guidance that would allow me to take on questioning reality as an overt practice. My

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