Sitting on the side of the mountain in my little trailer overlooking paradise I still wonder when things will shift; when I’ll get that phone call that says my life, as I’ve imagined it to be, is beginning NOW; that the moment has arrived – I’ve finally hit the Jackpot!
While sitting on the side of the mountain in my little trailer, overlooking paradise, I realize, to greater and greater degrees, that it doesn’t work that way – it being ME-ONENESS-UNIVERSAL SOURCE OF ALL THAT IS! My job is to learn about me in order to learn to be me. My way of learning about me is to sit on the side of the mountain in my little trailer overlooking paradise and notice when I’m anything but peace and in resonance with harmony. I notice when I’m in angst because the phone isn’t ringing, the emails aren’t coming and the bank account is thinning. I notice when I’m not living into my truth; when I’m pretending to live in my truth while I’m still practicing living in fear. Being me is the practice of experiencing the moment within which I exist. I experience the human me learning to release attachments to desired outcomes, learning to relinquish life as I imagined it – untethering myself from beliefs I made up when I was four years old – ones that said I needed someone in my life that would do the hard stuff for me – that I couldn’t do it on my own. It, in this case, is to live happily ever after, in the fullest expression of myself, with or without a partner, with serenity and joy.
Anyone who knows me and has worked with me as a coach knows that I’m all about empowering people to be it; be that individual who experiences the fullness of their being and is willing to live happily ever after in a reality perhaps totally different from the one so far imagined. So, if I don’t walk my talk; if I don’t experience the very essence of being that I want for others, well, I wouldn’t be able to go the full distance with you – I mean, those who are on the path – maybe that’s you, maybe it’s not you.
There’s very little time for navel-gazing going on here on the side of this mountain. Working with the books Oneness, and A Course in Miracles means studying me/Me. Rather than just reading the texts, I’m studying the phrases, absorbing the wisdom in the words; then looking within for resonance and dissonance, then choosing to practice living in resonance.
The other day, I read a passage about experiencing the resonance of harmony. I felt into it and asked myself “what is the experience of resonance of harmony?” All day I practiced living into that; that, being the vibrational resonance of harmony. I make that distinction because, through this practice of self-realization/self-actualization I know that what no longer resonates vibrationally will have to skedaddle, if it hasn’t skedaddled already, which translates as purging cellular memory, and other stuff too, out of my system, it will be coming through any moment. What doesn’t match the vibrational resonance of whatever you are being with – well, something has to give and you are the decider of what’s going to give – either the denser, fear-based vibrational stuff or the higher vibrational stuff. As I said, you get to decide.
This process can often be quite cathartic in nature – not always easy, comfortable and enjoyable, however every process like this has been excruciatingly rewarding, especially because it is the most elegant and raw way to experience me being ME.
A new client of mine, Nancy requested coaching from me because she’s been experiencing resistance in the area of building her business. Basically, she wanted a “How To” session so she won’t have to deal with the resistance. I wasn’t very helpful to Nancy, because I wasn’t willing to support her in avoiding resistance as if this was a part of life that we can easily skip over. Resistance is a giver of many gifts – my favorites are the gifts of self-exploration and self-awareness. Without resistance, few would stop to explore what it is that brings them to this moment in time; what beliefs, thoughts or judgments are in place that may be keeping them from taking that next step towards whatever it is they desire. The reason I bring Nancy into this picture is because, like Nancy, many of us experience a resonance with resistance more so than a resonance to prosperity or to other things we desire. We are held captive by the vibrational field of resistance until we figure out that it’s not the resistance but the vibrational field of self-awareness that we are in harmony with. It just feels like resistance. I know, it sounds confusing!
I’m as anxious to be successful in my business as anyone. And, I express my frustration everyday for things not being the way I expected them to be. It’s not suppose to be this hard, or take this long, or be so complex, or need so much self-discipline and vigilance. But, the truth is that sometimes it takes all of that and much, much more.
What I know – really KNOW to be true is that, it isn’t what I do that’s going to make the phone ring or the emails arrive. It’s that I be in the fullest vibrational resonance that I can be with ME. I don’t stop doing what I do, but I’m no longer attached to a desired outcome that I hope will come from the actions I take – the things that I do. I do them because I do them. They are in harmony with the ME that I am. I get to practice being my highest vibrational self within the doing and enjoying the moment of realizing that and nothing more. I know this sounds weird, yet I totally get the truth in the experience of being and in exploring this process with – with you as my witness. I’ll keep you posted!